Unwell

I've got to get out of this mind-set! Sure life is going ok; but, lately all I can think of is how it used to be. Chuck Dickens was right when he said, "Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some." Although, I'm not reflecting on past misfortunes, I tend to think more about what's not happening now.

Here's a song by Matchbox 20 that inspired me to blog:

Unwell

All day staring at the ceiling
Making friends with shadows on my wall
All night hearing voices telling me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good for something

Hold on
Feeling like I'm headed for a breakdown
And I don't know why

But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be...me

I'm talking to myself in public
Dodging glances on the train
And I know, I know they've all been talking about me
I can hear them whisper
And it makes me think there must be something wrong with me
Out of all the hours thinking
Somehow I've lost my mind

But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be

I've been talking in my sleep
Pretty soon they'll come to get me
Yeah, they're taking me away

But I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be

Yeah, how I used to be
How I used to be
Well, I'm just a little unwell
How I used to be
How I used to be
I'm just a little unwell


I feel as though my confidence is wheining, and dreams are just a blur. Somehow, I've bought into the survival mode of everyone around me. I remember being one who inspired people to dream, to dare to strive for excellence; but, these days, I find myself preaching the status quo: "where you are is OK."

What a crock!

Deep down inside, I know we were born for greatness - each and everyone of us. But, I've bought into the idea that mediocrity is acceptable. "It's OK to be that way - everyone else is, " is what they say.

Something's gotta give....