Deliverance

You know, I'm a bit disappointed in Yahoo!'s Launchcast Radio. I remember when I found it a few years ago - all the free online music I wanted; however, after a recent desire (or ability) to listen to music at work, I have found that they want me to pay to listen to the songs I like. So, to try to get around it, I found an artist that I wanted to listen to today - it's the Billy Joel Fan Station. Well, it started out OK.... I heard Piano Man 3 times in the first 7 songs, then for the last hour, they've played everything but Billy Joel! I'm still waiting to hear the song I Go To extremes - I was singing it in my head this morning (hey, I just got Extreme... More Than Words).

Now, I'm trying to figure out why this lack of deliverance is getting me riled up, so.... I am reminded of something that I've heard from several wise people, who said that when things get you agitated, it's really a reflection of something you don't like in yourself.
So, do I say I'll deliver, and fall short? Absolutely. Do I dislike that about myself? Sure, of course I do! But, it is something that I'm working on.
7 Habits tells us in order to see those public victories, we first need to attain some private victories. When I say to myself, I'm going to be here, or do this, I try to keep account. It's a tough road. Everywhere I look, integrity is being compromised; but, like my favorite poem says, I have to take the road less traveled.
I used to have a good friend who'd really ride me - keeping me accountable - but, I think I didn't come thru a few too many times, and they gave up on me. I think what happened, is that I got too disappointed in myself, and would take it out on them. Not good. We're still friends, but there isn't any real accountability there anymore.
There is another friend that I work on accountability with, but it's mostly me keeping them accountable. There really aren't many people who keep me in check. But, that's kinda how my life has been. Kind of a lone wolf.
I've made bold declarations in the past, and have asked close friends to keep me accountable, but nothing ever comes out of that... Damn, I hate apathy! (yes, another thing I struggle w. too :-s)....

Oh well, such is life. I that the Lord that I hear His Voice. He never lets go, and is always there to keep me going in the right direction. It's wonderful to have a Friend who is always there, and is always True to Their Word.