Could He be telling me something?

So, I get this email the other day from Jack Canfield (of Chicken Soup For The Soul fame) with a subject line of, "Are you being completely fulfilled?" Without even reading what the email was about, I answer with a resounding, "No!"
Of course, he's promoting a book to help me get on track, and I'm tempted to buy it - he usually recommends good things.

There also seems to be a "Changing Of the Guards" of sorts at work. My manager, our asst. editor, and one of our graphic artists are all leaving at the end of the month; which leaves me praying often as to how it's all going to shake out in the months to come. When you work in an office that only employs 8 people, 3 leaving is a HUGE deal!
I've not been 'completely satisfied' - to use Jack's phrase - at my job for quite a while. A couple of years ago, I told my boss that I didn't really like what I was doing, and he convinced me to stay b/c things were changing. A year ago, I told him that I wasn't any more satisfied, but, again, change was happening... so, I stayed. Now, the foundations of this organization are being shaken - this is the hardest month that I can remember - I am praying for direction.

The answer I keep getting is that I can't stay.

So, now I am planning my resignation. I like everything at my current job to just pull the plug, and jump ship w. the others. I'll likely stay another couple of months, making my tenure an even 4 years.

I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. And, with at least a week of vacation slotted in there, all I have to do is get through this month, and it's home free.... kinda.

The Truth About Life

Someone gave me a little calendar w. some nifty little sayings and such. Don't know who gave it to me - it was just on my desk one day at work.... I like it.
I just got back in the office today from a few days work out of town, so I started peeling away the days. Here's what Saturday's said:

to love life, to love it even
when you have no stomach for it,
and everything you've held dear
crumbles like burnt paper in your hands,
your throat filled with the silt of it.
When grief sits with you, its tropical heat
thickening the air, heavy as water
more fit for gills than lungs;
when grief weights you like your own flesh
only more of it, and obesity of grief,
you think, how long can a body withstand this?
Then you hold life like a face
between your palms, a plain face,
no charming smile, no violet eyes,
and you say, yes, I will take you
I will love you again.

- Ellen Bass


This is pretty much how I feel about life right now. It's hard. It's not as fun and reckless as it once was; but, it's still to be cherished.
Yes, no matter how crappy circumstances my be, Life is Good!