Winding Down

You know when you're reading a book, and you can't wait to read what comes next? But, you can't just skip ahead! No! You might miss something! But, the suspense is driving you mad!
That's what my life is like, right now. I want to be finished this chapter of my life. I want to start the next one; but, I can't.
The next chapter isn't quite ready to be written, and the ending has yet to be finished on the current chapter. Oh, that I had a bit more patience.

See, it'd be simple if I was just switching jobs; but, I'm not. I'm moving into the nebulous world of Self-employment. I've been there before, and I didn't fair well.... but, that was over 5 years ago. Things are different now... right?
Well, I do have a good bunch of guys to work with, and from the looks of things the compensation is such that I should be able to work when I want to. Plus, I think I'm going to like this new line of work.
But, in order to start this new business, I actually have to get educated. There are a series of tests that I must pass. I took one a few weeks ago, but didn't make the grade (for the 1st time in my life, I didn't pass an exam!); so, I write again this weekend. I took a practice exam last night and scored an 80%, so I'm feeling fairly confident - still time for some more last-minute studying, tho!

I love where this job is leading. It's leading to more time at home - I am looking forward to spending more time with my wife! Plus, I'm a major fish-head: I have 9 aquariums on the go now, have plans for 5 more!
It's great to have a carrier that'll fund your fun!

So...

As this chapter in life winds down, I am anxiously awaiting something new. I CAN HARDLY WAIT!

OK, here's the Skinny

It's being organized by a few clients of mine, and will be hosted by TAG Paintball - just a bit outside Edmonton. It's Western Canada's largest paintball field.

50 Teams of 14
28 Games
1.7 Million Paintballs!
8 Hours of fun!

Ok... the cost is $250/person, but there're cash prizes that range into the thousands of dollars! It basically works out to a day's wages for a day's fun. Start saving those pennies!

Largest Amature Paintball Tournament in Canada

OK, who's in??!!

A client of mine is hosting what is going to be the Largest Amature Paintball Tourney in Canada. Cash & Prizes to be won!

It's on Oct. 14 of this year. I'm putting together a team of 14. If you're in, let me know!

Hey Nostradamus!

I hate this book. But, I can't leave it alone. It's fiction, but it's just too real. It reminds me how much I detest religion.

"But, J... you're a Christian - you're religious," is what you're thinking, isn't it?

No, my friends. I hate religion. I hate a bunch of rules that just bind people up and make them... unhuman! I hate how it excludes those who are nowhere near free, and those who are (becoming) free.
But, to deny it's in me is to lye. I see it there, and I hate it. I hate how I don't associate with certain people because they're not like me... though the disassociation is not because I don't like them, but because it's just not kosher. I'm such a coward, sometimes.

But, really; this book is just too much. I have to keep reading it, but I feel that I need a couple days off from everything, just to process it.

Us and them.... I hate it. Eric, I hate it.

Today Is Yours

Today is yours -
to reflect on your dreams.
to reach for the future.
to savour your individuality.
and dance to your own rhythm -
A day to celebrate yourself.

- Andrea L. Mack

Friends?

There are several people I once spent some time with, but I don't see anymore. I interact with them primarily through their blogs.
Recently, another friend of mine - from a different circle completely - has obviously befriended some of these people who's blogs I haunt. This friend informed me that it wasn't cool to comment on their blogs b/c I don't hang out with them anymore.
Now, every time I read a friend's blog, whom I haven't spoken to face-to-face in a long while, I hear this other person telling me I'm not supposed to be there. And, every time I hear that voice, I want to say "Shut... the F*$&... Up!"

Now, I do still consider this person, who says I'm out of place, a friend. I respect their opinion and enjoy talking to them whenever the occasion arises. That's probably why it bugs me. There may be one or two of the people I used to know who don't want me to comment on their blog, but I'm pretty sure the others appreciate what I say... that I still care.
I don't know... I guess it will always be this way. Most people are so.... dramatic!

See, there are people in my life that I don't see very often anymore - I may never see them again. But, we were friends once. And, I will always call them a friend. I will always welcome them. Sure, we may not share the deepest parts of our souls to one another (did we ever?), but the way I see it, the doors always open to them.
But....
I know so many people who say, "They haven't called me in days/weeks/months. Screw them!" I just think, "When was the last time you picked up the phone, sent an email, dropped in? F#*%in' hypocrite." But, I usually try to be sympathetic and disarm the bomb.
People get busy. Life moves at such a break-neck speed, we can't expect to stay in touch w. everyone on our own. If it's not a 2-way deal, it just doesn't happen. If you want to connect with someone, you're gonna have to put some effort into it.

THAT'S JUST THE WAY LIFE IS

It isn't bad. It isn't good. It just is.

I have a friend, whom I haven't seen in quite a while. When we did get together, it was always in larger groups - and we were always closer to someone else in that group - so, we never really spent any time to really connect. However, they blog their life. And, I am glad that I'm able to still be a part of their life. I hope that I can offer some hope and encouragement in the comments I leave. I care for them. I feel for them quite a bit - I think we've gone through similar things in life (tho, they probably wouldn't think so).

Anyway. The whole point of this blog is to say:

I COMMENT BECAUSE I CARE.

If you're a friend from a bygone time, and don't think we're 'close enough' for me to comment on your blog (or on someone else's blog), I'm sorry. Ask me to keep it to myself. But, please realize, I'm not trying to be nosy, or bossy, or a know-it-all. I'm just trying to relate... to share a piece of myself.
Sometimes, online is the only place we can.

Let it Spring from Love

The thought manifests as the word;
The word manifests as the deed;
the deed develops into habit;
And habit hardens into character.
So watch the thought and its ways with care,
And let it spring from love
Born out of concern for all beings.

- The Buddha, 563-483 BCE

Life's A Changin'

I'm looking forward to the next few weeks. Though, I don't really feel any different, emotionally - I don't have any anxiety, trepidation or fear; I am going to be taking my financial life into my own hands... I'm going to start working for myself.
This week, I study, study, study; then on the weekend, I take a course and write an exam that, should I pass, will set me on my way to being a Financial Advisor. I will be able to help just about anyone take what they have and make it grow with little risk at all. I've already seen what it can do for friends of mine. Without increasing their monthly spending, they're able to insure both of their lives, pay off a couple loans, and invest a good chunk of change. When they retire, they'll have a healthy $60K+/year income... and taxation will be at a minimum!

One thing that is getting me charged up emotionally, is the idea of prayer. The people I work with now often pray together, and a couple of the newbies commented on how they enjoyed listening to me pray. I started to say that it used to be my favorite thing to do; but, then I realized that it still is.
As my schedule in the days to come becomes more clear, I am hoping to be able to get together with a few friends and pray more often.

The prayer I love and believe in is not so much the, "God, can you help me with this and that," kind of prayer. I love to take what God has spoken - in Scripture, and in the hearts of man - and declare it over my life, my family and friends' lives, over the city... I love the idea that when I speak with passion and purpose that which is unseen is changed.
I believe that we are foolish if we discount that which we do not see or understand. There is much more to life than what is seen - so much more. Oh, how I wish that I could convey what I've experienced in the spiritual realms of life; for, I know that there are many who have never searched beyond the natural world. But, often times I think that if I could just somehow convey what I've experienced, then they, too, would want to search for what is 'more'.
The doors are open to whoever will find them.

The older I get, the more I am convinced that the J-O-B is not what makes life important. I will not take that page from my parents' book (though, to be fair, it seem they're both writing a new book). I am looking forward to changing my career. I will still be helping people, but I will also be paid a lot more for the time I put in... and I can put in as much or little time as I choose. So, as long as I can meet expenses OK enough, I will have just about as much time as I want to direct toward that which I truly love to do.